I CAN´T FORGET THAT I FORGOT
HD video (visual arts, performance, dance and literature), 2020
duration: 16 min
author: Cristina Elias
inspired by Clarice Lispector’s text “The woman who killed the fish”
camera: César Meneghetti
editing: Cristina Elias
music: Leigh Thomas
In I can’t forget that I forgot, I try to give voice in different languages - performance, dance, image, spoken and written text - to Clarice Lispector’s short story The woman who killed the fish. Clarice’s text acts as a trigger for the composition of the movement, which, at the same time, rewrites those words.
The sound landscape of the video is composed of music (Leigh Thomas) and speech (my voice). This flow speech mixes recited passages from Clarice’s short story and text passages that emerged in the process of improvisation of the movement.
In “The woman who killed the fish”, a (supposedly) children’s story from 1968, Clarice brings to light the inner world of a woman who, forgetting to feed the fish entrusted to her, ends up killing them “unintentionally”. A complex world presents itself to readers, who are actively summoned to judge the “crime” then committed by this woman. “Do you forgive me?” With this question Clarice ends the book, leaving many questions open: the “woman” who “forgot” and who, unintentionally, “killed”; judgment and sentence through the eyes of the “other”; guilt, self-punishment and self-condemnation; on the other hand, a search for acceptance and forgiveness of one’s own self in imperfection, in human error.